Locked Sukata: Numb

Chapter 1

Locked Sukata 

My patience was my only companion for my malady to be calmed. I ran breathless to the bench and he appeared, still maleficent, still caring as if he was real. ‘Trust me’ he half whispered grabbing my hands. All my trust broke in seconds as soon as I stabbed my finger on the metal edge of my locket, a single drop of blood oozed from the tiny cut and he disappeared like a mist of winter. Want nothing more nothing less but want just your presence.

1. NUMB

I felt numb, for after I struggled into six months, for after I lost my senses, for after I lost everything. This wasn’t worth it, I knew I had to suffer more till I was left alone to fend for myself, to fall into laps of death. I tried to subdue the terror locked in myself, no matter how much I try I cannot run away from myself. I knew it from very beginning but still my heart was searching for the lost spring. Not a soul reasoned quietly with me, as my own mother used to do. Maybe that was the only hope that still kept me alive. I remember her perfect gentle caricature: fleshy red cheeks, small round eyes and her smiling heart shaped face. She looks like me, except with her deeper bluish eyes, still young and pretty in my own imagination. I was sure I found her face upset, her disapproval when we were forced apart. What possible sins could have pushed me to suffer lot, I didn’t knew.
Last fall I was brought to this place and was piloted to exile self-dependently in a white cell with no end, with no doors and windows. I never saw a door to this room, only heard sounds of different bells, which was never meant to me. A small bell was tapped- after about three weeks of my arrival-and the paramilitaries appeared from the missing white door which mingled with the wall every time whenever I tried to search for it. It took a couple of weeks to recover from sea-sickness. After which I started wrenching like a recalcitrant child for weeks and then went numb like a dead human body. It’s 1st of April, mom’s birthday and I’m hungry but I don’t want to mug those medicines again, they make me helpless.